Overcoming Underearning: Book Review Part 10
[I just realized I wrote this post last week and saved it but forgot to publish it.]
This week I’ve read Chapter 9 of ‘Overcoming UnderEarning’ by Barbara Stanny.
This chapter starts section 3 and is the second last chapter of the book.
“Your Game Plan”
“Think big. Act small. And never, ever stop until you attain your goal, no matter what.”
Barbara reminds us that overcoming underearning is a gradual, long term process that involves following her 5 steps:
1) Tell the truth about what’s not working, and what is.
2) Make a firm decision about what you truly want.
3) Look for opportunities to stretch by doing what you think you can’t do.
4) Surround yourself with a supportive community.
5) Respect and appreciate money by taking good care of it.
The Overcoming Underearning Promise
Small steps consistently taken lead to remarkable results.
She also suggests a plan to help you get in the habit of respecting money:
1) Every day, read something about money.
2) Every week, have a conversation about money.
3) Every month, save.
Next are some exercises where you write out your earnings goal, list your next steps, write a contract with yourself and a couple more.
Next time - Chapter 10 - the last of the book.
Time for my favorite quote from this chapter:
“Thoughts become words. Words become actions. Actions become habits. Habits become character. Character becomes destiny.”
– unknown
July 10, 2008
Overcoming Underearning: Book Review Part 9
This week I’ve read Chapter 8 of ‘Overcoming UnderEarning’ by Barbara Stanny.
In this chapter Barbara goes through step 5 of the 5 steps to make you a ‘doer’.
Step 5: Respect and Appreciate Money
The name of this step pretty much describes what this chapter is about. Now, personally, I don’t have a problem with taking care of the money I have, my problem is figuring out how to make more of it. But given the rate of savings in the U.S. and how much the average person is in debt, this chapter is probably pretty valuable to a lot of people out there.
“If you want it to last, you’ve got to take care of it.”
Barbara says that she met many people while researching this book and that “the ones with the highest net worth were not necessarily the ones who made the most money“.
Next she lists the Four Rules of Money:
1) Spend less
2) Save more
3) Invest wisely
4) Give generously
She also discusses how you need to shift your mindset from whatever it is now to that of a wealth builder.
From my own experience I can say that, yes, at times it was difficult to go without something I wanted - but I keep a close eye on my savings account. And it felt really, really, good to see that number get bigger and bigger over time. Sure, it takes a while. You have to be patient. If you can only save a little bit each month it takes a while, but it does all add up. And once I had a decent amount saved I was able to think about actually investing some in mutual funds. I ended up buying the ‘Mutual Funds for Dummies’ book and that really helped me a lot to understand what I needed to do.
Anyway, back to the book:
This chapter includes a 2 part exercise also:
Part 1: Track your Spending
Part 2: Spending Review
These are really important. I used to keep a notebook where I would write down everything I bought, all my expenses, etc. And see where I could cut back so I could save as much as possible.
Barbara is really giving some good advice in this chapter - do what she says and in a few years you will be very happy that you did!
Next time - Chapter 9.
Time for my favorite quote from this chapter:
“My advice to you is if you can’t afford it, don’t buy it.”
– Warren Buffett
June 26, 2008
Overcoming Underearning: Book Review Part 8
This week I’ve read Chapter 7 of ‘Overcoming UnderEarning’ by Barbara Stanny.
In this chapter Barbara goes through step 4 of the 5 steps to make you a ‘doer’.
Step 4: Create Community
Barbara explains how there were some people she worked with who worked really hard to get ahead, but still weren’t. She calls them the ‘Doers Who Didn’t’. She realized that it is important to interact with people who were supportive. And that ‘underearners either operate in isolation or gravitate to people like themselves’. (I think this is a key thing for me - I’m pretty isolated.)
She then goes on to list the 4 kinds of supporters: True Believers, Confidantes, Way Showers (role models) and Messengers. She has an exercise where you are supposed to list all the people in your life in those 4 categories and also the naysayers. I didn’t have many people to list in those first 4 categories. Although the Way Showers don’t have to be people you’ve actually met or who know you, so I could think of some people to add there.
Barbara then goes through 6 principles to create a powerful community:
1) Realize no one will do this for me, but I don’t have to do it alone.
2) Reach out, ask for support.
3) Hang out with the kind of people you want to be, not who you’ve been. (But how do you find these people or even get them to give you the time of day when you do?)
4) Recognize the role of the naysayer.
5) Watch what you talk about.
6) Respect yourself by taking time for you.
In general this whole idea of creating a community sounds a lot like what you need to do to have a successful web site or blog. And is something I’ve been working on. It doesn’t come easy for me - I’ve pretty much always worked in isolation.
Next time - Chapter 8.
Time for my favorite quote from this chapter:
“Apologizing for unintentional, low-profile, non egregious errors erodes our self-confidence and, in turn, the confidence others have in us.”
– Lois Frankel, author of Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office
Sorry this weeks review is kind of short - uh oh - I’m apologizing for an unintentional, low-profile, non egregious error! You’re not going to lose confidence in me are you?
June 19, 2008
Overcoming Underearning: Book Review Part 7
This week I’ve read Chapter 6 of ‘Overcoming UnderEarning’ by Barbara Stanny. (I’m a little sleepy tonight, so this might be a bit brief.)
In this chapter Barbara goes through step 3 of the 5 steps to make you a ‘doer’.
Step 3: Stretch
“Whenever you decide to do something different … the desired result always lies just beyond reach, in the Discomfort Zone.”
I think I know where this is going and its already making me nervous!
“Your biggest barrier is fear.“
Fear has always been my biggest problem with everything.
Barbara says “feel the fear, endure the discomfort, observe the resistance, and go for it anyway”.
I’ve been trying that, but it isn’t always easy.
“There’s no escaping the Discomfort Zone.“
I think you can escape it, but not if you want to be successful.
Next she has a Journal Exercise: “If you were not acting out of fear, what would you do?”
That’s a good question. I need to think on that one a while. Sometimes I imagine what I would do if I were someone else in my situation. Generally, that ’someone’ else is somebody who isn’t afraid.
“From this day forward, find ways to stretch on a regular basis.”
I need to do that too. Later in the chapter Barbara has a couple more exercises - 1) making a list of what you need to let go of that is holding you back; 2) think of and write down a stretch you want to take but have been afraid to.
That’s three really important things I need to think about from this chapter:
1)What would I do if I wasn’t afraid
2)what do I need to let go of
3)Think of a stretch to try everyday
Next time - Chapter 7.
Time for my favorite quote from this chapter:
“The question I ask every day is the same it’s always been. How much further can I stretch to reach my fullest potential.”
– Oprah Winfrey
June 12, 2008
Overcoming Underearning: Book Review Part 6
This week I’ve read Chapter 5 of ‘Overcoming UnderEarning’ by Barbara Stanny. Lots of good stuff in here, this will take a while.
In this chapter Barbara goes through step 2 of the 5 steps to make you a ‘doer’.
Step 2: Make a Decision
I have to quote some parts from the first part of the chapter which really stood out for me.
“Not one of us will ever make more money until we explicitly decide that’s what we want to do. I saw this with every six-figure woman I spoke to.”
She then explains that a decision is not the same as the goal you set for yourself. “A decision is a promise you make to yourself, a declaration of intention, that says you’re willing to walk through fire to make it happen. ”
Personally, I can say - I am ready to walk through fire to make it happen!
“Making a decision means slamming shut all the doors to other options, blocking off the exits, and, no matter what happens, keep moving toward your destination because anything else is unacceptable.”
Barbara then relates a few examples then there’s an exercise: Making Your Decision. I haven’t finished going through it yet.
Next she talks about “The Grand Conundrum“: a “deeply embedded, rarely conscious, internal conflict, often between the comfort motive and profit motive”. She also explains about how it is necessary to live in a way that is consistent with your values - there can be no dispute between your values and goals. The next exercise involves listing out your values.
Once you make the decision she says 3 things will happen:
1) Coincidences - “You need to be stubborn about the results you’re going for, but very flexible on how you get there.” (This is something I’m getting better at, but still need to work on. I can get too caught up in doing a particular thing and lose sight of why I was doing it to start with and not realize there are other ways of getting to the same point.) It seems that once you are really determined to do something, some opportunities just seem to pop up out of nowhere.
2) Changes in other areas of your life - taking charge of your life is likely to result in some sort of ’shake up’ - possibly both positive and negative. (When I read this what popped in my mind was Caroline Middlebrook and some of the things she’s talked about in her blog.)
3) Resistance - “Resistance emerges as soon as you enter the Discomfort Zone, the space between where you are now and where you want to be”. Barbara then lists 12 signs of being in resistance. I won’t list them all here, just the ones that stood out to me:
— You’re scared into inaction
– You fog up, space out
– You feel paralyzed
– You find reason not to act
I think the first one, fear, is what affects me the most. Lastly there is a section about decoding resistance and an exercise.
Ok - I’m I am ready to walk through fire now! I’m not letting fear hold me back!
Next time - Chapter 6.
Time for my favorite quote from this chapter:
“Money is a guarantee that we can have what we want in the future.”
– Aristotle
June 5, 2008
Overcoming Underearning: Book Review Part 5
This week I’ve read Chapter 4 of ‘Overcoming UnderEarning’ by Barbara Stanny.
Starting with this chapter Barbara goes through the 5 steps to make you a ‘doer’.
Step 1: Tell the Truth
“Telling the truth is a prerequisite for higher pay.”
There are 4 exercises* in this chapter.
Exercise 1: Pinpointing the Problems
In this exercise she has a Problem Indicator Checklist. It seems to be mostly points about how you handle your money. Now for me that isn’t the problem. I can take care of the money I have quite well. My problem is not being able to make more.
Exercise 2: Digging Down to the Roots
These have to do with how you feel about money and where you may have learned these responses. She also quotes in this section from Oliver Wendell Holmes “All limitations are self-imposed”. Now I don’t think this is literally true - there are just some things I wouldn’t be able to do due to size, age and other things. But, what I really would like to be able to do at this point in my life I’m pretty sure I am capable of doing.
Exercise 3: Replacing Beliefs
Here we are supposed to list everything we believe about ourselves and money and write a new belief to replace the old one. In my case I wouldn’t really know what to write here. I think my problem has more to do with my inability to be able to see myself as the type of person who could be earning that much money. As much as I want it, people who are really successful seem somehow different from me and I have doubts about if I can really do what they are doing.
Time for my favorite quote from this chapter:
“The truth is the only safe ground to stand on.”
Next time - Chapter 5.
*the first exercise had 2 parts, I think that is how she counted 4 exercises
May 29, 2008
Overcoming Underearning: Book Review Part 4
This week I’ve read the second half of Chapter 3 of ‘Overcoming UnderEarning’ by Barbara Stanny.
This next section is titled: “The Most Important Financial Advice You’ll Ever Get”. And the answer is:
You’ve got to be willing to be uncomfortable.
Its making me nervous already … so basically, we have to change to increase our earnings - and that change will be discomforting. At first anyway.
Kind of an aside, but she mentions that she’s met women who didn’t start making lots of money until they were in their 50’s, 60’s and 70’s - that makes me feel hopeful!
Barbara ends this chapter with ‘Eight Rules for Achieving Remarkable Results’. I can’t list them all here in part because I’m too lazy and a slow typist to type it all in - also maybe she doesn’t want me giving away too much of her book for free.
But here’s the ones I thought were best - underearning can no longer be an option, keep your commitments, don’t let yourself get derailed, do what you dread.
She mentions that if you don’t do what you say you are going to, it chips away at your self-esteem. I think she has a point there. I’ve definitely let outside distractions keep me from doing some of the things I know I need to, to be successful and then I feel bad about it.
Anyone else experience this?
Time for my favorite quote from this section:
“The only thing money gives you is the freedom to not worry about money.”
– Johnny Carson
Next time - Chapter 4.
May 22, 2008
Overcoming Underearning: Book Review Part 3
This week I’ve only had time to read half of Chapter 3 of ‘Overcoming UnderEarning’ by Barbara Stanny.
In the first paragraph Barbara writes “the key to upping your earnings is rarely working longer hours …” - yeah, that’s what I’m doing now. I’m working pretty much every waking hour, except on weekends.
She talks more then about how high earners ‘think’ differently which results in different choices and outcomes. And some of the inner voices that tend to hold us back like “you do not have what it takes”. (I hear that one sometimes myself. I think, I don’t know if I can do what someone like Wendy Piersall’s done.)
She goes on about how to be able to shift your thinking you need to do both Inner Work and Outer Work. Inner Work has a lot to do with self esteem and included in the book is a ‘Self-Esteem Inventory’. I can’t write all of it out here though, but I will say that some of them apply to me, and most likely to many women.
According to Barbara women tend to put others before ourselves and tend to feel like we are being selfish if we don’t. It is most likely the way we are raised. Many women, more so than men, tend to be raised to believe that we are supposed to take care of others and as a result we neglect ourselves.
One result of this is not recognizing or valuing our own worth - including how much money we deserve to make. Then many women feel guilty when they want to do more for themselves - whether it be for their careers, health or financial situation.
My favorite quote from this section:
“Don’t forget to love yourself.”
– Soren Kierkegaard
Next time - the rest of Chapter 2.
May 15, 2008
Overcoming Underearning: Book Review Part 2
In chapter two Barbara tells us that one common trait of underearners is “a high tolerance for low pay“. Now I wouldn’t say I’m ‘tolerating’ low pay - but maybe I am. I don’t like it, but I haven’t changed the situation.
Even though I’m sure I am an underearner she also says that “Even if you’re not a bona fide underearner, the principles in this book will definitely help you get ahead“.
She then lists 10 traits of underearners. I’m not going to list them all here but I will list the two that I think especially apply to me:
Underearners underestimate their worth - I’m pretty sure I do this
Underearners are self-saboteurs - “procrastinate, take on too much, become scattered and distracted” - I know I do this!
She goes on to say that while there are sometimes things that happen that are beyond our control, most of the 10 traits mentioned are things we can control. She also spoke a bit about empowerment.
My favorite quote from this chapter:
“Work your fingers to the bone, what do you get? Boney fingers. Boney fingers.”
— Hoyt Axton
May 8, 2008
Overcoming Underearning: Book Review Part 1
This week I had time to read chapter one, which is still kind of introductory. She talks a bit about having ‘financial independence‘ - I’d sure like that! But who wouldn’t?
Then we (the reader) are supposed to think about what it is we want. Or what our goal is. Since the book is part workbook - there is a space there to write your goals in. She then tells us the goals she had in mind for us (again, the reader) when she wrote the book. I won’t list them all here. What stood out to me though was “replace a bake-sale mentality with a grander vision” and to explore what is blocking you from being more successful.
Those are two things I definitely need help with. On one hand I do have a ‘grand vision’ but its kind of buried beneath the ‘bake-sale mentality’. I don’t know why that is.
She suggests having one or more people to do the exercises with. I don’t have anyone - except you people reading this! I don’t know if I want to share everything in a blog - but maybe I can share bits and pieces.
She talks a bit about inner voices. Both the negative ones you shouldn’t listen to and your “authentic voice” you should listen to.
The chapter ends with a quiz to determine if you are or are not an underearner. I knew I was before even taking it, but the quiz confirmed it.
I noticed the book has lots of really good quotes interspersed on the pages. My favorite from this chapter was:
“Life is not about finding yourself.
Life is about creating yourself.”- George Bernard Shaw
Next week: Part 2
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